Ninjapino's Blog


Posted in Life in general by ninjapino on May 31, 2010

Three years ago tomorrow.  That’s how long it’s been.  That’s how long it’s been since she left.  For me, add a few months to that and that’s how long it’s been since I’ve seen her.  What hurts is the fact that I had the chance to see her one or two more times beforehand, but didn’t.  I told myself that I didn’t need to rush.  I had plenty of time.  I should have known better.

I went to see her today.  It’s been a while since I’ve done that.  I left flowers for the first time.   Don’t know why, but it helped.  She’s been on my mind a lot, lately.  It might be because it’s so close to the date, I’m not sure.  She one of the few women I can actually say I ever truly loved.  Hell, she’s one of the few people I can say that about.  Whether that was a platonic love or not on my side, I’m not sure.  But I do know that she loved me back.

She completely changed who I was.  I had my set of beliefs at the time that I never truly believed.  I just thought that it was all fact.  She taught me that I don’t have to except that.  That I can be who I am and still love life.  That was probably the greatest thing that she ever taught anyone: Love.  It was her greatest gift and she had more then enough to share.  She might have been a little naive at time.  Also, stubborn as anybody I’ve ever met.  The funniest thing was, you could never prove her wrong because of that.  And you wanted to believe what she believed.  A world where people where honest and good….they just had to stop being self-centered long enough to notice it.

I love you and always truly will.  I miss  you.


2 Responses

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  1. mrsjamiecbaker said, on June 1, 2010 at 1:54 pm

    Not sure of an intelligent response, mainly because I am terrible at knowing what to say about these things.

    I do know that anyone who can have this type of effect on a person has to be someone amazing, so you are definitely lucky to have met and known her and to have had her in your life for a short while.

    I hope you’re all right… and yes, I know how lame it is to say that, but I do hope you’re okay.

  2. Laura said, on June 1, 2010 at 5:44 pm

    I miss her so much too.
    When somebody you care about that much passes on, they take a peice of you with them. It’s hard to know that we wont get those peices back until someday when we’re reunited. I miss her every day and I know you do too. I was remembering with fondness today all the times you and I went out on our non-dates with her and K to see movies or out to dinner or whatever. I’d give anything to have those times again.

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