Ninjapino's Blog

Facebook Future

Posted in Uncategorized by ninjapino on May 26, 2011

Facebook has become a part of most people’s daily routine.  Even if we know full well that the odds of anything interesting and new being posted are slim, we still check it.  Hell, I have it on my phone, yet, everyday day after work, I come home, sit at my desk and log onto Facebook.  It has become a part of our lives that, for all the security issues, is far too convenient to let go.  And that’s good.  I could get into the whole security vs services debate, but it’s not an area I’m well tuned for.  I have my opinions on the matter, but that’s neither here nor there for the moment.  But, I do want to talk about Facebook in general.  I want to talk about where it is taking us.

Years before, when the internet was still a wondrous new playground, a metaphorical box of sand (including the newly found shards of glass that came along with it), the tech savvy of the world got into a brand new form of communication called “e-mail”.  E-mail, much like Facebook today, brought about a new era of communication.  It brought us to new lengths of communication and staying in touch that we never thought of before.  It was great.  People were addicted to checking there e-mail just as much as people are addicted to checking Facebook now.  It allowed us to easily send messages, images, and sometimes video if you had enough space.  Not only did it allow us to send these things to each other, we could easily save and store them.  No more old shoe boxes full of yellowing paper and damaged pictures.  No more digging through piles of photo albums to find that one shot that you took of your son all those years ago that you really want to show his new girlfriend to embarrass them.  No more having to develop pictures, hand write letters, make an envelop, and waiting a few days before your friend received them. Best of all, no more forgetting that those (mostly) wonderful memories even exist.  It was a great time.

Not long after came social networks such as MySpace and Facebook.  (Hell, I even had a Xanga site for a while if anyone else but me remembers that)  You could share thoughts, feelings ideas, pictures, videos, etc, with anybody you were willing to put on your friends list.  Many people took the term “friend” very loosely and added as many people as they could out of some misguided idea of “winning the internet”.  While it lost it’s intimacy, the value we gained from being able to open up to that many people at one time was immense.  It was just awe-inspiring the amount of ideas, thoughts, and philosophies could be transffered and brought to your attention at a moments notice.  We reveled in it.  Now, years later, Facebook is the obvious king.  Like e-mail and cell phones before it, those refusing to buy into the new form of communication are being left in the dust.  Some people like it that way, I understand, but the point still stands.  You are being left behind.

Now years later almost everyone has Facebook.  We post, we write, we talk about our daily lives, and we share the pictures.  It’s still relatively new to us.  The oldest picture most of us have on there is probably around 6-7 years.  There are a few of us that went back and posted really, really old pictures of when you were little for the fun of it, but those were still just posted recently.  There is a little nostalgia, but not much.  But the thing you have to remember, those pictures are now up there.

How many of you have gone back and deleted pictures just because they were old?  I’m betting not many, if any at all.  Now fast forward about 50 years.  My best is, Facebook is still around and it’s still as convenient as ever.  Almost everyone will have one as they do now and that includes you, Grandpa.  (Or Grandma as the case may be)  And, unless you have decided that it was needed to clean your virtual house, so are those picture of that spry 20 year old on your page.  They will be there for all of those on your friend’s list to see.  Think about it, in the future, when the old people of the world are well versed in the ways of online, and it’s not weird or a hassle to have your mom as your “friend”, those pictures will be there for your kids, your grand kids, that nice young man that helps you with your yard to see.  As for me, I couldn’t be happier.

As generations grow apart, so does the understanding between them.  A lot of it comes from this idea that the different generations are extremely different.  This is not the case.  Your parents partied just as hard when they were in college.  They had idealism just like you do.  Parents, your kids are probably alright.  They’re really not doing anything more dangerous then what you used to do.  Granted, this is a generalization, but you get my point.  With the added years of Facebook and all those post and images you are putting up right now…..the children of the future could very easily see that.  That picture of you at a bar holding up two separate drinks at once.  Those funny pictures of you and your friends hanging out.  That post you drunkenly made at 2am but found it too funny to delete the next day.

People have a tendency to look at the past and think of it as simply that, the past.  I, for one, can’t wait to walk by my grandson while he’s on his Xtrabook 3000 multi-media handheld and spy him browsing my old pictures out of curiosity.  I’ll probably bust out laughing when he gets to the picture of me in my friend Billie’s mini-skirt.

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Haze

Posted in Life in general by ninjapino on May 21, 2011

The world looks so much different first thing in the morning.  I’m not talking about the rushed, it’s still barely light out, I’m going to work type morning.  I’m talking this morning.  Driving for an hour and a half this morning on no sleep, the haze of last night hitting me in between the eyes like a dart.  The roads and the world were unrecognizable, but completely familiar.  The morning light baring down, but in a soft manner, knowing full well it could crush us at any moment.  Like an elephant stepping on an egg.

The whiskey stale in my stomach, forcing me to take in more then I would on any other occasion.  Not hungover, per say.  More in a sober-Hemmingway state.  My eyes catch every speck in the air as they fly by my open window.  Every wisp, every clump of pollen, every piece of downtown trash on the side of the road…..and also the litter.  It’s all beautiful.  It’s all part of the experience.

And now back to the real world.  In reality, I do not normally have the luxury that I explored this morning.  In reality, I’ve got shit to do.  Namely, finally getting some sleep.

Vent

Posted in Life in general by ninjapino on April 22, 2011

Write, damn you…..just fucking write…..you know you’re good at this…..or at least you used to be until you let yourself go.  You stopped exercising……you got lazy and stopped working out your writing skills and now you are out of shape.

Here I am, another sleepless night sitting in bed with my laptop.  No reason, no purpose, just my brain is letting itself wander from thought to thought stopping at a million points, all of them wonderful ideas or, at the very least, interesting in some respect.  They aren’t inherently good, but you can make them good and you know you can.  It’s time to start working out again.  Get back to those wonderful short stories and half a scripts you used to do in your short college career.

It’s weird, I’m in a better position in my life where I have time to write and very little distraction from doing so, yet I have fallen so far that it’s hard for me to do so.  Maybe that’s the problem.  Maybe I need chaos.  I have no muse.  The closest to one I ever had was the frustrations in my life caused by the chaos.  But if that’s the case, then I’d have to deal with the chaos again.  Do I honestly wish that upon myself?  No…..no, I do not.

Do I wish this contentedness I now have?  It has made me soft, in a sense.  It’s comfortable now.  I have no reason or right to complain…..but it lost me the fury I truly felt in life that caused my true writing.  I’ll feel it in short burst now, but I am having trouble channeling it.  Is that a good thing?  Or would it be better to force myself to suffer in order to share it with the world?  Or do I need to find a happy medium?  A way to channel that energy while not driving myself to the insane point I was previously at?  But, then, will it truly be honest?  Or would it be a half-ass attempt at what I really could do if given the proper motivation.

Hell, I don’t know…..all I know is that I need to start working out more often…..too many ideas are going to waste in my fat little brain.

Fuck.

Her

Posted in Life in general by ninjapino on May 31, 2010

Three years ago tomorrow.  That’s how long it’s been.  That’s how long it’s been since she left.  For me, add a few months to that and that’s how long it’s been since I’ve seen her.  What hurts is the fact that I had the chance to see her one or two more times beforehand, but didn’t.  I told myself that I didn’t need to rush.  I had plenty of time.  I should have known better.

I went to see her today.  It’s been a while since I’ve done that.  I left flowers for the first time.   Don’t know why, but it helped.  She’s been on my mind a lot, lately.  It might be because it’s so close to the date, I’m not sure.  She one of the few women I can actually say I ever truly loved.  Hell, she’s one of the few people I can say that about.  Whether that was a platonic love or not on my side, I’m not sure.  But I do know that she loved me back.

She completely changed who I was.  I had my set of beliefs at the time that I never truly believed.  I just thought that it was all fact.  She taught me that I don’t have to except that.  That I can be who I am and still love life.  That was probably the greatest thing that she ever taught anyone: Love.  It was her greatest gift and she had more then enough to share.  She might have been a little naive at time.  Also, stubborn as anybody I’ve ever met.  The funniest thing was, you could never prove her wrong because of that.  And you wanted to believe what she believed.  A world where people where honest and good….they just had to stop being self-centered long enough to notice it.

I love you and always truly will.  I miss  you.

Video Games That Need To Be Movies.

Posted in Movies, Video Games by ninjapino on May 20, 2010

As you probably know unless you live under a rock, the video game franchise, Prince of Persia, is going to be coming to theaters shortly.  After a long history of crappy video game movies, I must admit, this one actually looks like it might deliver.  Finally, someone in Hollywood seems to be taking this potential goldmine seriously.  Considering the giant demographic cross between video games and movies, you’d think this would have been done a long time ago.  Instead,  the best we’ve been offered comes in the likes of campy, cheesy action flicks such as Tomb Raider and (arguably) the Resident Evil franchise.  And, at worst, we’ve been stuck with the likes of Uwe Boll.  (who the hell kept giving him game rights, by the way?  Whoever it was, we need to strangle them.)

Jerry Bruckheimer, the mastermind producer that turned a children’s amusement park ride into a swashbuckling hit seems to have done his homework.  He, admittedly, has never played the games, but at least he had someone play them for him to show him what it’s all about to get the feel and the characters right.  And to top it off, he actually made it a point to have Jordan Mechner, the writer for all the Prince of Persia games, write the script.

Hopefully, this starts a trend.  Below, I have listed the video games that I think need to be given the cinematic treatment.   Also, these are not in any particular order. (more…)

Emojoe

Posted in Assholes, Life in general by ninjapino on May 19, 2010

Today was an interesting day.  For those of you who haven’t been around me or just haven’t noticed, I’ve been pretty much feeling like crap for the last month or so for several different reasons.  Today, though, I honestly feel good.  And for that, I have my friends to thank.

For those that don’t know me, I seem to suffer from a massive lack of self-confidence and a lot of self-loathing.  I could go into why this is, but it would only be hyperbole from self-evaluation.  I believe my reasoning are truthful, but who am I to say if I’m right or not?  Lately, these feelings have become overwhelmingly unbearable and I had almost completely broke my resolve.  I finally  decided “fuck it” and ask my friends about one of the issues that continues to plague me.  My  friends are very honest people, so they answered me very honestly.  I know that they never truly believe the jokes that are said and I don’t expect it to stop.  If it did, then I would honestly be more worried then before.  I know my friends love me and all I expect out of them is honesty.  When I get that, I am happy, as long as it’s done in a civil manner.

At times, I do not know what to do with myself.  At times I just want to sell all I own and leave.  Just start new.  But I know that if I do that, I won’t escape my emotions, I’ll only delay them for the time being.  I’m trying, folks.  I really am.  This blog is just one step toward trying to better myself and, in turn, my opinion of myself.  It’s an odd feeling of not feeling worthy of the people I know, but at the same time feeling the rest of the world is not worth me.  When it comes down to it, I feel as if I’m the laughing stock of everyone who is important to me most of the time.  Mostly because I let myself be the laughing stock.  I have friends who are great at many things, yet I’m afraid to do anything myself for fear of failure.  It was something I grew up with that just became a part of my being.  I guess I just have to say, “fuck it.”  If I fail, my friends will still be my friends.  That’s really all that’s important.   Besides, I think they would appreciate the extra ammo.

Michael Cera Vs. The World.

Posted in Uncategorized by ninjapino on March 30, 2010

Dear Hollywood,

Stop putting Michael Cera in good movies.

Thank you.

Sorry, I should probably explain that little diatribe.  As many of you know, I am a nerd.  I take pride in being a nerd.  And in doing so, I do nerdy things such as reading comics.  Sometimes these comics get made into movies.  This can be a wonderful and horrible thing.  We have seen great comic book movies (Watchmen, The Dark Knight, The Incredible Hulk) and horrible concoctions of film that are an assault on the eyes (Fantastic Four, Spiderman 3, Ang Lee’s Hulk).  One of the newest comics-to-film that is coming out is Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.  Now, which category does this fall under.  Let’s do the breakdown.

Pro: It is being directed by the wonderful Edgar Wright.  If you do not know this name, learn it.  He is the genius behind the Blood and Ice Cream trilogy which consist of Shawn of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, and soon, The World’s End.  This man knows how to do funny, entertaining movies.  And I really need to watch Spaced…..

Pro: It’s based off of the Scott Pilgrim books.  I’ll admit, I’ve only  read the first two and that was a while ago, but I didn’t stop because I didn’t like them.  They are hilariously awesome and unlike anything I’ve read before.  I simply never got around to it.

Pro:  Well, just watch the trailer.

Now for the Con.  I’ll be honest, it’s only one.  But it’s enough.

It stars Michael Cera.

Bull-fucking-shit!  Why, Hollywood?  Why do you keep doing this to us?  Do we not serve you well?  Do we not let you pretty much get away with whatever atrocity you want to call film and give you millions of dollars for doing so?  Why do you continue to let this guy stay famous?  How many other mid-20 somethings do you have stored in a back closet just waiting for their chance to shine yet you keep using this guy.

This guy..... is playing this guy....

“Oh, but I love his movies!”, you say.  “Superbad was hilarious.”  “Nick and Nora was adorable”  “Arrested Development was one of the greatest TV shows of all time” “Year One….well, yeah, Year One sucked monkey balls…”  These are the things people think of when they think of Michael Cera and all of these things are correct.  But do not, for a second, think that any of this is due to that, to quote a not-so-famous Michael Boltan, “no-talent ass clown”.

Go back and watch all those movies.  Go ahead, I’ll wait.  Well, okay, I’m not actually waiting….this has already been posted by the time you read this, so you can just read it at your own leisure.  But take as much time as you need.  Then you can pretend that I waited for you and that I’m that nice and patient of a guy.  Oh, good, you’re back.  Notice anything?  Michael Cera never plays a single different rolls.  He barely talks, kinda stammers, is constantly looking either down at the ground or wide-eyed as if he’s afraid something might attack him at any time.  Now look for an interview with him online.  He’s exactly the same.  Why?  Because he’s not fucking acting!

I honestly have no idea why this guy is famous.  He is the most awkward human being I have ever seen.  His expression never changes and when his roll doesn’t call for an awkward teen/college student, he seems terribly out of place.  Please….just stop….

Ditch

Posted in Uncategorized by ninjapino on March 21, 2010

Yes, tonight, I was ditched.  I was supposed to meet a girl tonight.  I told her to meet me with my friends tonight for drinks?  So what did I do when she never showed up?  Got drunk.   Yep.  That is my life.   I love my life.  But, of course, I can never get anyone else to love it with me.  It sucks.  Yes, I love my friends.   They are currently over here enjoying my apartment, which I love having people over.  Yet, instead of enjoying the night, I get pissed off and drunk because, once again, I was left by myself by a girl that told me she was interested.  Why does this happen?  Yes, I am drunk.   And I don’t give a shit.  And the girl that I actually want to be with basically told me to give up.  She doesn’t want to be with me.  Neither do random girls I meet.  So, apparently, girls that actually have feelings for and random girls that don’t, neither have feelings for me or want to be with me.  Awesome.   Whatever.  I give up.   I love the female form.  It, apparently, doesn’t love me.

The Pursuit of Happyness

Posted in Uncategorized by ninjapino on March 17, 2010

Ignore the fact that stole the title of my post from a book turned Will Smith movie.  Moving on.

A couple days ago, a friend of mine joined a group on Facebook entitled “No, I don’t drink or smoke.  I just deal with my problems.”  He is the exact type of person to join such a group.  He’s a hippy, vegan, artist and one of the most amazing guitarist I’ve ever met.  I love this man.  He’s happy-go-lucky to the point where it almost becomes unbearable, though.  I honestly have to say that he puts up with almost too much from people and won’t say a word and acts as if it never bothers him.  It got me to thinking.  Is that what I’m missing?

Now, for those of you that don’t know me that well, let me tell you a little background.  I am a born again atheist.  Yes, you heard that right.  I was born and raised in the church and lived by it wholeheartedly.  Then, over a course of time, for many different reasons, I saw the light.  Oh, lordy, lordy, I’ve been saved from belief in the Lord!

With these newly opened eyes many more opportunities were open to me.  I didn’t go overboard with anything, but I did start things such as drinking, smoking (not tobacco, I’m not stupid.  I don’t do anything that is chemically addictive), and having the occasional promiscuous rendezvous with the beautiful (admittedly, sometimes not so beautiful)  creatures of the opposite sex.   Now, I’m not saying these are good things.  Some of the times, they are far from it.   But I do enjoy them.  But do they make me happy?  Or am I simply doing them to make myself think I’m happy because, as my friends group stated, I cannot deal with my problems?

Back in my time of being a closed minded individual, I honestly cannot think of a single time I was truly happy with myself.   Yes, I did have a smile on.  I sang, I danced, I praised the lord and did other normal teenage stuff within limits of my faith.  I condemned sex, drugs, and rock and roll with the exception of Christian rock because I could not stand the likes of Michael W. Smith.  But in truth, I was a very unhappy person.  You ask anybody who knew me back then.  Most of them I don’t talk to much anymore for various reasons, but I had some issues.  I blocked my friends, reveled in drama, and wrote sad poetry about how worthless I was.  I was emo before being emo was cool.  (Why the fuck is it cool now, though?  That’s my question.)

But, this post isn’t about my decent into madness.  That will be saved for another day.  What this is about is the question of “am I happy now?”.   Truthfully, I have to say, “Yes”.  I actually am happy right now.  What people like my formerly mentioned friend don’t understand is that substances like booze are not always a way to escape for people.   No, I am not denying that for some people it is.  For some, it’s a serious issue.  But for me and my kind, it’s not.  Religion is what I abused.  But now, I’ve gotten myself away from everything that made me hate who I was.  I do not deny myself  the choice of doing what I feel should be done.  All these substances are for me is a way for me to enhance the atmosphere around me.  I can definitely have fun without them.  I have on many occasions.  My friends know that I willingly choose to be our DD on many nights simply because I want them to have as much fun as they can.

I’m seriously the happiest I have been in a long time right now and it’s not because of any chemicals or lack thereof.  It’s  simply because, as of right now in my life, I have a good job that, even though it sucks, it keeps me going and could be a lot worse, I have amazing friends who I love and would do anything for, and I honestly have nothing bad in my life right now.  The only thing I feel missing right now is a female companion, but the love I have for my friends is enough for right now.  It kinda sucks because I will admit to always having been a hopeless romantic at heart, but I can deal.  Back in the day, I wouldn’t have thought that.  I would have thought that losing the girl (not that I’ve fully given up on her yet) was the end of it all.  But I no longer need anything to fill any gaps.  I’m whole.  Something I was always told faith would fill yet never did.  I mean, I love you, Sara, but that is one thing you got wrong.  It’s okay to let yourself free.  Just because it alters your perception, doesn’t mean it alters you.  It only does if you let it.

People, I love life and you can’t convince me otherwise.  Yes, there are other things I want, but nothing I feel I need right now.  I might bitch, I might complain, but that’s just because, at times, I slip and become greedy.  Be the trouble you want to see in the world.  As long as you love where you’re at and you’re not harming anyone, fuck everyone else.  Don’t let them tell you how to be happy.  If they are trying to convince you that something will, they are probably trying to convince themselves, too.   Have fun, humans.

Get a Life

Posted in Life in general by ninjapino on March 6, 2010

I’ve noticed something.  Everyday, weekend or not, if I’m ever getting back home after 9pm, there is not a single parking space anywhere near my building.  What the hell, people.  Unfortunately, I have never had the chance to really meet any of my neighbors, but I have seen them about.  Majority of them are not much farther from my age (mid-20s), yet I seem to be the only one that stays out late.  Especially weekends.  I know I do not have that exciting of a life.  I enjoy what I do and I enjoy hanging out with my friends.  Is this no longer the norm for those recently turned adult?  I thought this was the time of our freedom.  Get out of your house for something other then work!  Leave me a parking space!

It’s odd.  At times like this, I wonder.  Am I actually older then I think I am?  As a fan of Kevin Smith’s work, I grew up believing that this was the time to figure out who we are and what we want to do.  Not start settling down.  Who has time for that shit?  Maybe I just am late because I skipped most of college.  However, sadly, I am starting to feel the pains of getting older quite literally.  I actually have a muscle cramp in my chest right now.  My lower back was hurting most of the week after the Dot Dot Dot show on Saturday.   I don’t want to be getting older.

I know a lot of this can also be contributed to the fact that I haven’t worked out in forever.  I plan on changing this, soon, but still…..I should be able to put my body through any type of torture and come out unscathed.  I’m not used to this.  Body, I command you to go back to the resilience you had five years ago.  I was boring five years ago and didn’t use you properly.  Now I am and you are acting like it’s too late.  Fuck that.  I still get in argument of Batman vs Superman and play with Ninja Turtles and Legos sometimes.  This isn’t right.  They say that age is only in your mind.  Tell that to my fucking body (or lack of fucking, maybe) and hopefully it’ll listen.  I’m (not) too old for this shit!